Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Quotes From a Fun Book

My friend Diane game me this book: Today I Will Indulge My Inner Glutton: Health-Free Affirmations for Cynics, by Ann Thornhill and Sarah Wells. It's full of great one-liners for those of us who aren't health club members, or who are feeling guilty because we've put on a few pounds. This books celebrates "the joys of not following the slim-waisted, sunken-cheeked pack."

Here's a few to get started, and I'll do more as time goes by.

Today I will intentionally tell a coworker whom I dislike and who has obviously gained weight that she is looking thin.

Today I will embrace my shallow existence.

In order to feel productive today, I will go on a ludicrous fad diet that will accomplish nothing except make me miserable.

Today I will direct all my resentment towards people who can afford personal trainers.

I understand that I must learn to love my body, but I reserve the right to do so only when highly medicated.

If we could harness the energy created when my thighs rub together, not only would it save the environment, but it would make me a hero.

That's all for now. I'm feeling this way, I think, because I was really stupid today. No breakfast--just coffee--since I had a meeting at the high school that ran long, a HUGE lunch to make up for it, including dessert, and now I feel too bloated to eat supper. I bet at 9 tonight I'll be hungry. Not now. I just feel full, and it's 6:30. So, no ARF-5 a Day post. No dinner with a nice photo. Just whining.

1 comment:

Ivonne said...

Cyndi,

This book sounds like so much fun! Thanks for mentioning it and for posting some quotes ... very funny!